acting and rejection

Why I walked away from my lucrative Wall Street job

Why I walked away from my lucrative Wall Street job

I dreamed of being an actor for a long time. But no one knew it, and I didn't pursue it.

Instead, I choose to bury my passion in exchange for a full-time sales & trading job at a Wall Street Bank.

I still tried to act when I could get away with it. But it was hard. REALLY hard.

It wasn’t ok for me to leave the desk for much more than grabbing lunch. In fact, I got reprimanded once for taking my daughter to the doctor for a sudden body rash.

So, you can imagine how much I dreaded getting calls from my agent. Calls meant auditions which meant I had to lie. And lying meant a giant pit in my stomach for days.

Ruggedly handsome chocolate?

Ruggedly handsome chocolate?

I was at an weekend retreat recently and wanted chocolate. No surprise there.  

What was surprising was that when I walked into the meeting room a bit later, it was like someone had read my mind. There were bags of Ruggedly Handsome Cowboy Bark all over the table!

Oh wait…

It was actually called Ruggedly Adventuresome Cowboy Bark.  

I was sooo disappointed. Buttttt,  it made me realize that I see the things I want to see sometimes.

And so do you.

Do you need to break up with yourself?

Do you need to break up with yourself?

You’re not going to believe this, but I just listened to my first episode of This American Life about 6 weeks ago.

And oh.my.god.  Where has this been all my life? 

The episode I heard was Act One of "The Breakup," with special guest Phil Collins. It was a cascade of belly laughs, tears and or warm fuzzy feelings that took me right back to the 80s. 

Because Phil Collins was a big part of my life back then. 

You're probably not going to book your next audition.

You're probably not going to book your next audition.

I grew up in Hawaii, and since I lived near the beach, it was fairly common to go surfing after school.

Well...everyone else would surf.  I mostly just got bounced around in the shore break.

But one day as I was riding towards shore, a cross-current wave sideswiped my board and tossed me into the air. I did some sort of flip and – inexplicably – landed, feet first, unscathed, back on my board like nothing had happened.   

I almost wouldn’t believe it was true myself, except that my friend, Matt, witnessed it.  

It was crazy.  

And quite frankly, it’s statistically impossible to ever happen again (especially since I don’t surf anymore).

You know what else is statistically improbable?

What Spanx taught me about acting

What Spanx taught me about acting

You know that horrible dream when you’re trying to make an emergency phone call but you keep hitting the wrong numbers? Or the one when you arrive at a posh wedding or high school reunion and realize you forgot to shower and are still in your sweaty workout clothes

Frustrating, right?

It’s a bit how I felt after I drove to my first audition in LA only to find out, after the fact, that they decided to go non-union.  

Luckily, there was a HUGE bright side to my 14-hour drive.


Remember your why

Remember your why

If you read my blog post, “The power of being naive”,  several weeks back, then you know that I went to the University of Michigan and that I’m pretty much obsessed with it.  #goblue.

I wish the Wolverines had won the NCAA tournament, but I was still blown away by the way the team played.

It was freaking impressive by all accounts.  

But what I loved the most, was how the coach, John Beilein, responded to a reporter’s question after their loss for the title.  His words speak volumes about him as a coach and mentor for those young men. He said: